A tango debate on Facebook. February 2016

Views about tango were expressed on the White Rose Tango Facebook page. Some were wanting milongas to be run like jive or salsa freestyles, others hated the cabaceo and wanted women to be allowed to ask men to dance. I could not help myself I had to respond:-

Tango is not salsa, it is not jive. I need a tanda, I am building a relationship. We embrace (in yoga terms, heart chakras in contact). I cherish and protect her. I give to her and expect to receive, as I want a connection beyond the physical. We move to the music. I do not just step on the beat but look for something in the music that I enjoy and move to that. If she hears that, we are on the right track. We pause, we breathe together. Tango is pure love, with its highs and lows. Salsa is a one night stand.

Sometimes my partner is nervous, shaking or rigid, I must relax her and make her feel safe. I must make her look good but that is not my sole purpose. She may just take from me and give nothing, then there is no hope. Life is laid bare, on the dance floor.

I want the same process with familiar partners (do men EVER take women for granted!?)

In Buenos Aires milongas are crowded (even though there are at least 20 to choose from every night). Sometime men sit one side, women the other side, of the floor. It would be physically impossible to cross to be close to invite for a dance. Hence the cabaceo. Even if I approach a woman to invite her to dance, I make eye contact. I do not speak to the top of someone's head.

Having said all that, of course we should not slavishly follow Buenos Aires. Tango is an art form and should develop. Imitate, assimilate, innovate.